The good new is that Jan will not be going to jail.
Jan received a phone call from our doorman this morning requesting her presence down in the lobby where a small mob had apparently gathered. When she got there, she was met by a sea of disapproving eyes and a dirty crunchy mess on the sidewalk outside. We live on the fifth floor. That is a very long fall for a depressed plant pot looking to end it all.
Luckily, the woman passing beneath our balcony when the aforementioned pot met its untimely death was not injured in the incident. That did not stop an unknown concerned citizen from calling the police to report my sweet wife.
The police soon arrived and the crowd logically grew larger. All the while, Jan was turning redder and redder and poor little barefoot Emily filled her time by scowling at the bystanders and waving at the sidewalk saying, “Bye bye, flower!”.
The law that states that all plant pots must be kept on the inside of the balcony railing is apparently of the “unwritten” variety so Jan got off with nothing more than a slap on the wrist and an elevated public profile in our neighborhood. A quick glance up and down the street revealed that few, if any, people abide by this unwritten rule. I don’t think the woman who was almost done in by our daffodils took any solace in this interesting statistic.
Jan has locked herself in house, drawn all the curtains, and will be wearing sunglasses for the rest of the day.
Well, I’m sorry no one else has posted, because I think this post is hysterical. Thanks for brightening my day – be sure to send along the tabloid photos.
Tell Jan it is okay. The plant is in a better place now. And you assume he jumped.. maybe it was a coverup and he was pushed… (enter twilight zone music. PS – notice the new last name – Andy and I did the deed this weekend! I’m a married woman!