Joshua Zamrycki's Weblog

Watch as Emily and Sebastian, in matching green shirts and blue jeans, perform in their “free” Jumping Show, complete with merry soundtrack and dramatic lighting. There might even be some audience participation in you’re lucky . But watch out for the flying feet and random head butts. And, whatever you do, please don’t talk while you’re in the audience.

Times are tough, but not bad enough that I’ve stooped to hawking dodgy pharmaceuticals via Spam emails from my old Yahoo address. My account was somehow hijacked. Sneaky fuckers. I Spammed over 300 people. So mortally embarrassing. My guess is that the Yahoo servers were hacked into directly. I’ve changed my password and deleted all my contacts just in case. Thank goodness it wasn’t my primary email account. If you were unlucky enough to receive one of these, please delete it immediately. And I’m sorry.

It’s no secret that I’m a big fan of the statistics. Numbers in general really do it for me. So it may come as no surprise that I regularly track the traffic of this blog, including which Web sites people visit before coming here. Yes, I can do that. And if they come here as a result of a search engine, I can track the search terms they entered. Fun!

Just this week, people have found themselves reading about me and my family because they first searched for the terms “bubons“, “nude paintball“, “hang up“, and “dirty baby“. I love it.

The #1 all-time search engine term that has lead people to this blog? “13th week of pregnancy“. Crazy, right? The #2? “infant visual stimulation“. Wild. The #3? “student id template“. That all makes sense. I’ve written about all of these topics at one point so it is no surprise that I should appear as a search result on Google. Predictable statistics.

But just in the past month, a new search term has been leading people to my blog at an unprecedented rate. That term? “pictures of hedgehogs“. Yes, I did write an entry about Emily wanting her class name to be The Hedgehogs. But why did this massive influx of people begin precisely one month ago? What cosmic event occurred that made people start searching for images of hedgehogs? And why did it suddenly stop just yesterday? Just like the question of why we dream, we may never know.

Josh’s Blog Top 11 All-Time Search Terms

1. 13th week of pregnancy
2. infant visual stimulation
3. student ID template / fake ID
4. smart people
5. philip glass buys a loaf of bread script
6. mommy
7. baby boy pictures
8. twisted spine
9. joshua zamrycki
10. my boys can swim
11. kowabunga

I was up until 4am last night trying to establish a static IP address for my computer so I could open a port in my router to allow me to create a Web-based media streamer. Why? Just to see if I could.

I was getting ready for bed just before midnight when I stumbled across an article about Subsonic – an open-source Java-based media streaming solution – and I knew I wanted to give it a whirl. But setting up remote access to my computer proved to be too much for my addled mind once I had turned into a pumpkin. But I woke up at 8am with the kids and gave it one last shot before going to work and I managed to get the whole thing running beautifully in just under 15 minutes. And I learned a lot about port forwarding, DNS servers, and Linux networking in the process. I was so excited that I almost didn’t realize how tired I was. Almost.

You see, I was getting bored with the 1 GB of music I had loaded on my phone. And I wasn’t about to load and reload new music every few days just to keep things interesting. Sure, I could have packed my 32 GB micro SD card to the gills with music but, you see, I don’t listen to music all that often on my phone. Much more often, I watch video. And video takes up significantly more space than audio. So loading music on my phone just became an afterthought.

I had also loaded about 4 GB of music onto my work laptop so I could listen while at the office. But even that was getting stale. And how often does one really want to choose new songs to copy to a thumb drive and then transfer to an external device? I just didn’t have the space to load all 53 GB of quality music I have at home on any portable device. And that’s why Subsonic is such a wonderful solution. Now, I don’t have to copy my music onto anything. Ever. I can just stream it. Onto my phone. Onto my work computer. Onto your computer! Anywhere. The music lives on my home computer and I can listen to it wherever I go. Pretty frickin’ sweet.

Oh, and when I got to work this morning there was a brand new laptop waiting for me. Score! But that meant that I had to spend most of the day setting it up, configuring firewalls and proxies, and transferring data from my old computer. I can’t believe I’m actually sitting in front of a computer right now to write this. I’m going to sleep. G’night!

Here’s some singing for you all to enjoy! Watch as Emily bounces around and sings along with Train’s Hey, Soul Sister while Sebastian does some background dancing, decorates the house, and eats a fruit cocktail.

Here’s some dancing for you all to enjoy! Watch as Emily and Sebastian dance, jump, and flip around the living room to one of their favorite tracks from the Moulin Rouge soundtrack. It’s thirsty work.

Looking outside at the rain, which hasn’t stopped falling all day, Who’ll Stop The Rain by CCR just came on the radio. Here’s what the prognosticators are prognosticating:

Everything is wet.

Som els de la colla del Follet Valent.
Som els de la colla que estima la gent,
no tenim por de la nit ni la foscor del bosc.
Vine, vine amb nosaltres.
Vine, vine amb nosaltres perquè…
Som els més petits de tots els animals,
si ens agafes amb dos dits ens pots fer mal;
la nostra força és la que portem dins del cor.
Ben units i alegres sempre ens trobaràs,
les llumetes al capvespre s’encendran;
vine amb nosaltres, no deixis mai aquest camí, camí, camí.
[Google Translate]

Michael and Derek came over for lunch this week. We had a grand old time catching up and chowing down, but the copious quantities of African curry and white wine (as they often do) lead to utter disaster.

You may view the carnage in the video below, where Winnie-the-Pooh (Josh), Tinker Bell (Emily), and Brobee (Derek) attempt an impromptu puppet show but are no match for the destructive powers of Sebastian The Show Stopper.

Happy 2nd birthday, Sebastian.

Launching Point

This boy is a force to be reckoned with. I’m constantly amazed at how laid back he can be, lounging on the sofa (or on the floor), sporting the most docile temperament. And then, the very next second, he’ll be bouncing off the walls, screaming blue murder, shoving Emily to the ground, and kamikaze diving off the arm of the couch on his way to find more footballs to throw across the room. We have come to expect the unexpected.

Sunshine State Golden Boy

Here’s a short set of two-year-old bullet points to give you a glimpse into some of the things our little boy is up to these days:

• I’ve given up keeping track of Sebastian’s vocabulary. I tried to maintain a running tally of his newly-acquired words for the longest time, but right around November – as soon as he turned 21 months – his speaking took off like a rocket. It was painfully difficult to fight the urge to compare Sebastian’s language progression to that of Emily, but it was even more painful to give in to that urge and actually make the comparisons. Emily was talking circles around this kid from the age of 12 months up to two years. But the boy has been making a comeback in a big way, now happily stringing words together, counting, using adjectives, recognizing colors and shapes and animals, and generally making a whole lot more sense that he had been. And this all only really started in the last few months, which seems crazy to us since it feels like he’s been talking forever.
• I would like to pay special attention to one particular word that Sebastian has only recently started saying. The word Yes. We thought that Yes and No (especially No) would have come a lot sooner. He still isn’t saying No. But he now says Yes. But only in French. I believe this has developed from his transforming the Y into the easier W and his complete inability to finish words with an S. So his Yes comes out like Oui (with a very Parisian accent) – just like Wet, but without the T.
• Yes, the counting started just over a month ago. First, there was Two. There were two of everything in the world. Two dogs. Two cars. Two trees. Even when there were obviously more than two, Sebastian still told us there were two. Sometimes, if there were four stars in the sky, Sebastian would cheerfully shout, “Two stars!” And then after a thought, “Another two stars!” But then he discovered three. Few things are cuter than watching Sebastian meticulously attempt to isolate and extend three fingers on one hand so he could tell us how many cats he has seen. And this was quickly followed by four, five, and sometimes, six. I have even heard seven and eight mentioned, but not consistently. Just don’t expect him to count them in the proper order. He still sometimes counts his five toy cars, “Two, three, four, three, four!” He’s never got the hang of One, though.
• It’s absolutely something you take for granted once it happens (like so many things), but Sebastian has finally started feeding himself. Thank Christ.
• Surely one of the biggest milestone of the past year is Sebastian has moved out of our bedroom and is now sharing a room with Emily. We decided to make the transition after we finally settled back in following our many holiday adventures around the New Year and Sebastian never even batted an eyelash. He still wakes up at least once in the middle of the night so we now have to trek from our room down the hall to settle him, but his awakenings are fewer by the day and we’re optimistic. Thank goodness Emily is an incredibly heavy sleeper.
• Sebastian’s favorite pastime? Hiding. He does it all the time. But very different than Emily’s love of hide-and-seek, Sebastian is actually good at it. Add to this his camouflage coat and we honestly have a hard time finding him sometimes. Once he decides it’s time to hide (and this could be any time), he’ll leg it into the nearest bush and press his face against a branch somewhere in the middle and just stand there motionless until someone walks right up to him and declares, “I see you!” Walk up to him without the statement and he doesn’t move. Shout the statement from a distance and he doesn’t move. Thank goodness the coat has a bright orange inner lining in the hood.
• I don’t know why I reacted so strongly, but I was absolutely blown away when Sebastian started singing last month. I remember thinking Emily was the cutest thing in the world when she started singing (and she was!), but we always knew it was on the cards. Maybe since Sebastian is taking longer to speak, I didn’t expect the singing to start for another year. I don’t know. But then he caught us completely off guard when he decided to serenade us with his earnest rendition of Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. Next on his playlist was Row Row Row Your Boat and the theme song from Little Einsteins.
• Sebastian hasn’t started school yet so, in an attempt to get him socializing with other kids his own age, we took him to a music class once a week. The kids and parents would sit in a circle and sing and dance to all their favorite kiddie songs. The class was held in a nursery school so there were toys all around the room, but the kids were told not to play with them, for this was a music class. But Sebastian knew there were cars and trains in those toy boxes and whatever Sebastian wants, Sebastian usually gets. And if he can’t get what he wants, he’ll scream the house down. And, apparently, if you won’t stop screaming in a music class, you will be asked to leave. Sebastian was kicked out of his music class. So we started going to a playgroup twice a week. They sing and dance in the playgroup, too. But if you want to play with the toys in the toy boxes, they don’t get all fascist about it.

The Sound of Silence

We’ve got a big year ahead of us. Sebastian will be starting nursery school in September (God help them). We’ve already got him signed up for the same Waldorf school that Emily went to. He’ll be there everyday from 9 to 1:30. We’re very excited. Also exciting is the prospect of Emily and Sebastian being able to play in new and more mature ways. Him shoving and head-butting her is all well and good, but I wouldn’t mind it if they sat down to a game of checkers. This should be the year of potty training – I’m not looking forward to that. The midday nap will probably be whittled down from two hours to one hour. And, as always, we should be seeing more of the world, though now that Sebastian is two years old all of our airfare will increase by 33%! Not cool. But we’ll definitely be doing the England thing in the summer and then again for Christmas, we’ll jet off to somewhere unknown location for Easter and then again in the summer, and we’ll finish the year off with a trip to New Orleans to see cousin Darren wed the wonderful Molly. Fewer than five new stamps in his two-year-old passport will be unacceptable.

Stairway Sticker Sock

Wanna see a couple dozen beautiful photos of our little earthquake taken over the course of this past year? Well you’re in luck! I just so happen to have a link all prepared to show you just that. Quick, click here:

And finally, here’s a video of a 23-month-old Sebastian telling us all about subterranean automotive storage spaces.